I begin this blog post with a profound sense of gratitude for the mercy and grace of God. It took me seventy-two years on this earth before I truly encountered Jesus. This is why I say It Is better to meet Jesus at an old age than never met Him at all.
He had to come to me, as I was not actively seeking Him. This journey has taught me that it’s never too late to find faith, and that meeting Jesus at an old age is a blessing beyond measure.
It is hard for me to believe I was walking around on this earth thinking I knew Jesus when, in fact, I did not know him at all. I was nice and kind to the people I met, or at least I thought I was. I went to church with my wife on Sundays and again on Wednesday nights, and I usually paid my tithes.
I never enjoyed going to church because I never got anything out of it. To me, it was just a boring few hours, but I did not complain because I knew my wife enjoyed it. I never told my wife that Jesus was not a living being; he was just something for church people to imagine.
I was like the Apostle Thomas because I never would have believed that Jesus existed if I had never personally met him. I wonder if other people believed that Jesus existed without personally meeting him or if they personally met him, too.
When I speak of a personal encounter with Jesus, I mean a union so intimate that it feels like you share the same internal organs. It’s a relationship where nothing can be hidden, even if we wish to. This level of intimacy with Jesus is both comforting and challenging.
I do not know if God put me in that awful place or if he allowed Satan to put me there; I will not tell you what place it was, but believe me, you do not want to go there. It was a place of deep despair, where I felt completely lost and alone. I do not know how I got there or how long I was there, but when I realized where I was, I was there in that awful place.
When I was in that awful place, Jesus came to me. I wanted to hide from him but knew there were no hiding places. So, I sat there or stood there; I do not remember which one. I was looking lonely, sad, and stupid. That is when Jesus approached me, and we became one.
That is when I first realized Jesus was a living being. That union changed everything. My eyes were open for the first time in my life. I saw the world in a new light, with a newfound understanding and compassion. I wish that had happened to me fifty years earlier, but as I stated earlier, it is better to meet Jesus at an old age than never meet him at all.
Prior to meeting Jesus, I had a wife and raised four children. However, I came to realize that I was not a Godly person. I was devoid of love, and this lack of love reflected in my actions towards my family. For seventy-two years, I lived under the illusion of being a believer, when in reality, I was a person of wickedness.
I knew some of the things I did and how I treated my family and friends were not the right thing to do. I did not have Jesus in my life back then, so I made a lot of bad choices. I wish I could change them, but it is too late. All I can do now is ask for forgiveness.
As I stated earlier, I wished Jesus had come into my life fifty years ago, but I never seriously asked him, so that is why he did not. But when he did come into my life, I did not ask him then either, but he still came.